I’ve seen an incredible amount of shitty think pieces and listicles insinuating date location choices are of the utmost importance. “29 Awesome First Date Ideas That Don’t Involve Sitting at a Bar” or “10 Things To Do On A First Date So You Don’t Plan Another Boring Coffee Date”. I’ve even seen “What your first date location says about you” quizzes. And while I agree that doing out-of-the-box date ideas is great, I’d personally much rather save those for a date when I already know the person. I favour the apparently “boring” coffee dates, and here’s why…
Coffee dates are low-commitment!
I can determine if a date is going to work out within 5 seconds of talking to them. Call it intuition, or maybe it’s just knowing what I want, but either way, I just know. Even if you take a little longer to determine your interest, I still think most people are able to get a good sense if they’ll be continuing to pursue their date at maximum thirty minutes into the interaction. Which is why I think quick dates are ideal.
Coffee is the ultimate quick date. Typically coffee dates have a natural end when both or all parties are done their drink, so if you realize early on it’s not working for you, you can quickly finish your drink and use that as a natural excuse to leave. On the flipside, if the date going well, you can take your time, and even go on to order something else the menu offers. You can grab your drink (I actually don’t drink coffee, but mochas) in a to-go cup too so that you’re not stuck to staying around and having to shoo your date away if you’re not digging them.
Coffee dates are (generally) safe!
Meeting in a public place for a first date is important on so many accounts. Coffee shops are public, usually in busy areas, and going back to my first point, easy to wrap up when you realize something is wrong. Plus if your date refuses to go to a coffee shop, it probably means you wouldn’t want to go out with them!
Coffee dates are (generally) accessible!
Coffee shops are some of the most accessible establishments for a variety of people. Not only is there always a coffee shop around every corner (so easy for people to get to), but their items are priced fairly (in comparison to dinner dates, or movie dates). Plus, most coffee shops are wheelchair accessible too! Going on a coffee date is great, especially if you don’t know too much about the person you’re going on a date with, as it can be accessible to everyone!
“But coffee is boring and typical.”
Sure, coffee isn’t a creative date, but I don’t want too much effort into planning the first date when there’s a good chance I might not get along with the person. I recently had a Tinder match ask if I wanted to come over to his place to cook with him for our first date. I hold him “hell no” because of all of my points on this list and suggested coffee instead. He told me coffee was too boring for him but I completely disagree. First dates are about getting to know someone, and you don’t need elaborate evenings to accomplish that. Coffee shops take away any distractions or activities, and just leave the entertainment of the night up to the compatibility of the people on the date.
Some people may prefer drink dates to coffee dates, and while I enjoy them, I don’t prefer them over coffee dates. Involving alcohol in any first date scenario increases risks, and might not be good for people who don’t drink alcohol.
What are your favourite things to do on a first date and why?