CN: rape culture, mention of Kavanaugh, DDlg, the state of the world, the upcoming midterm election, fuck cis men
You know, we predicted it to be a bad year on a lot of fronts, but I think we managed to exceed our expectations of general Badness. It seems like that Badness has been escalating recently too; at the start of the year Badness was simmering, but with the recent Kavanaugh situation, the impending midterm election, and the global warming warning, things aren’t the cheeriest. My dating life has followed suit, and I’m certain the global scale of things has affected that.
My super slutty levels may be down, but even trying to pursue romantic endeavours is makes me straight up fed up. Here’s why.
Who’s got the time?
Anyone who says they’ve felt excited and fulfilled by dating in the past year deserves a medal. Whenever I even think about opening a dating app or going on a date, I get tired. I’m a busy woman, with work, school, and trying to get my life together slowly; who has the dang time to pursue a romantic or sexual partner in these worldly conditions? I feel emotionally drained at the thought of trying to pursue anyone, so much so that in the past year I have gone on one date. THAT’S A RECORD LOW for me. Last year I was filled with mojo in regards to dating; I went on many dates and had a lot more sex. This year, I just don’t have the energy for meeting new people and going through the phases that it takes to set up and go on a successful date.
Fuck cis men.
Say it with me, one more time: fuck men. While my dating energy may be low, my patience is thinner for men. As much as I rolled my eyes and shamed men in the past for gross comments, bad first messages and generally horrible online presences, this year my judgement is snapping. Relating to my first point, this queen does not have time for shenanigans and rude men; Y’all are getting blocked left, right and centre. Who cares if you are cute and have generally good ethics and politics? YA RUDE, YA GET THE BOOT.
On another level of fuck men, fuck men who don’t believe survivors, fuck men who believe they have right to control their partners, fuck men who take up time by asking for free labour and fuck men who won’t stand up to their friends for being misogynists. Fuck devil’s advocates, fuck rapists and fuck anyone who supports them.
I’m, quite frankly, too cute for this.
God, this may be the most narcissistic thing I pen, but I’m, quite frankly, too cute for this. I’m a queen who deserves top-notch experiences with top-notch people, and I get that that’s not a “realistic reality” but goddamn if I’m not hopeful. This adorable smile, kinky and curvy femme is TOO DESIRED to be having to woe over people who aren’t good enough for her. My prince is out there, and I will not stop until we find each other. I’m a selective slut and people can fuck off until I’ve done my selecting.
It’s hard to date when you like someone even though you’re not monogamous?
As a gal who’s never been monogamous, it’s quite hard to deal with the idea that I don’t really want to date anyone because I really like one person in particular. Not that I’m not opposed to non-monogamous dating, but in my heart-of-hearts, I just wanna cuddle up to him right now. I know it’s not a permanent feeling, but I feel like I can’t even look at other people because it makes me feel sad that I’m not spending time with my Daddy (because I don’t get a lot of time with him anyway). It’s like the adjacent feeling of jealousy? Perhaps I’m just not naturally non-monogamy inclined but here I am.
Tinder banned me.
Tinder was my shit when I first started my blog. People knew me because of my Tinder sexcapades and vast knowledge of the popular dating app. But, they deleted me. After posting a photo of myself I quite liked, Tinder decided it was too bare for their standards and immediately ejaculated me from the app, even though I paid for Tinder Plus, had given them free promo all these years, and even taught a class on their dang algorithm. I got back on, using the phone number function to sign up, but it wasn’t but two months later when I was taken down again.
Life without Tinder has been bleak; if I wasn’t interested in dating before, I’m sure not now. Bumble is bland and OkCupid is just full of random men messaging me, which again I don’t have the time and fuck cis men. All in all, I’m fed up.
How has your dating life held up this year? Let me know how you’ve found hope, or share in my wallowing in the comments down below.